This would be a better place if I was the President.

You know something that really really annoys me? People who stand on the right side of the escalator, that's who.

We take escalators everyday. They're god-sent; automatic stairs which bring you up heights of 10metres upwards. You don't have to break a sweat because this machine is literally lifting your lazy ass! Of course, the magic of escalators is that you can use it as stairs at the same time, shortening your journey even further.

Escalators are everywhere. Let's take my journey to camp for example, and count how many escalators I have to ride.

At Tanah Merah Station, I take one down to the underground, and then another to the control station and finally another to the platform. That's THREE.

I would ride said train all the way to Paya Lebar. At Paya Lebar interchange, I take THREE escalators just to get to the Circle Line Platform. This brings our total to SIX.

I would take the Circle Line to Bishan, and from Bishan, I would take the Red Line to Ang Mo Kio, but before that, I've to make my way on foot to the Red Line platform. To get there, I take TWO escalators, bringing our total to EIGHT.

I finally alight at Ang Mo Kio Station. To get to the control station, I take an escalator down, then I take another to get to the underpass, and then another up to the bus interchange where I would take 169.

What's our grand total? If you've been keeping count, it's freaking ELEVEN. And if I have to go back and forth camp that day, it'll be TWENTY-TWO ESCALATORS.

Most of the time, the ride up the escalator is a pleasant journey. If you're lucky, there'll be a girl wearing a short skirt riding slightly above you! If you're lucky there'll be girls on the other side who are gorgeous. If you're unlucky, you'd be rushing up/down the escalator, and some dumbass would be blocking your way.

I hate to cite anything from stomp, but here's a picture to illustrate my point better:














It's damn irritating! When the train is right there, but some gay is blocking your way....oh, it makes my blood boil. Most of the time, I'd just say excuse me, but what if the person blocking the way is several steps in front? Nothing you can do but suck thumb.

Here's what they should do: Install tasers on the right side of the escalator. If you stand there for too long, electric shocks would be sent through the handle, or the platform, and you'll know you're doing something bad. Deceptively simple, yet shockingly effective.



Or they can color the handrails a different colour. It'll be a visual stimulant. It can be red, and they'll think danger, and they won't stay there for an extended period of time.

Simple right? Riding up/down those 22 escalators would be orgasmic if I was the President.